Honey, What's For Supper?
An elderly gentleman of 85 feared his wife was getting hard of hearing. So one day he called her doctor to make an appointment to have her hearing checked. The Doctor made an appointment for a hearing test in two weeks, and meanwhile there's a simple informal test the husband could do to give the doctor some idea of the state of her problem.
“Here's what you do,” said the doctor. “Start out about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.”
That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he's in the living room. He says to himself, “I'm about 40 feet away, let's see what happens.” Then in a normal tone he asks, “Honey, what's for supper?”
No response.
So the husband moved to the other end of the room, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, “Honey, what's for supper?”
Still no response.
Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his wife and asks, “Honey, what's for supper?”
Again he gets no response.
So he walks up to the kitchen door, only 10 feet away. “Honey, what's for supper?”
Again there is no response.
So he walks right up behind her. “Honey, what's for supper?”
“Damn it Earl, for the fifth time, CHICKEN!”
Friday, October 7, 2011
SOOOF TEXT
Horseman In The Sky
Carter Druse was born in Virginia. He was a southerner. When the United States was divided by a terrible civil war, Carter decided to join the Union Army of the north.
He told his father about his decision to join the north army. His father looked deep into his son's eyes. "Carter, No matter what happens, be sure you always do what you think is your duty."
One sunny afternoon, Carter was sent to guard. It was his duty to be sure that no enemy soldier spied on. Suddenly, he saw a man on horseback standing on the huge rocky cliff. He held a gun in his right hand, and the horse's reins in the other. Unavoidably, Carter pointed his gun. Carter was calm as he pulled the trigger.
Soon after firing his gun, Carter was joined by a Union sergeant.
"Did you fire?" The sergeant whispered.
"Yes."
"At what?" The sergeant continued.
"A horse"
"Was there anyone on the horse?" The sergeant asked again.
"Yes."
"Who? " The sergeant kept asking.
"My father."
Carter Druse was born in Virginia. He was a southerner. When the United States was divided by a terrible civil war, Carter decided to join the Union Army of the north.
He told his father about his decision to join the north army. His father looked deep into his son's eyes. "Carter, No matter what happens, be sure you always do what you think is your duty."
One sunny afternoon, Carter was sent to guard. It was his duty to be sure that no enemy soldier spied on. Suddenly, he saw a man on horseback standing on the huge rocky cliff. He held a gun in his right hand, and the horse's reins in the other. Unavoidably, Carter pointed his gun. Carter was calm as he pulled the trigger.
Soon after firing his gun, Carter was joined by a Union sergeant.
"Did you fire?" The sergeant whispered.
"Yes."
"At what?" The sergeant continued.
"A horse"
"Was there anyone on the horse?" The sergeant asked again.
"Yes."
"Who? " The sergeant kept asking.
"My father."
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